Saturday, February 27, 2010

Ouch ouch ouch.

I had forgotten the feeling of playing my bass all day after not playing it for a while.

It is manual torture.

Hmm...I've just had a very musical day today. Interesting.

I just played my violin unprompted for the first time in several years.

I'm not really sure what made me do that.

But I just took it out, tuned it, and played one of the only melodies that I can remember, which, unfortunately, is entitled "Blackberry Blossom" and is a super redneck fiddle tune.


Friday, February 26, 2010


Here it is, past three in the morning, and I haven't yet felt even the faintest hint of sleep descend upon me.

This is sure to be an interesting night/morning/eternity.


Oh my goodness.

Oh my goodness.


I just...



Thursday, February 25, 2010

Remember back when gangstas and thugs were using the word "cribs" to reference their tricked out homes? Why was that ever a thing? I would never in a million years think that equivocating yourself to a baby in any way would make you sound like a tough guy.

Also, I've decided once and for all that I do not like the sound of the trumpet. It's just so...brash and abrasive.


Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Quote of the day:

"There was very little to see: the submarine's scanners were searching the waters in vain. The disturbance created by their jets had probably scared away the smaller fish: if any creature came to investigate, it would be something so large that it did not know the meaning of fear."

From Childhood's End by Arthur C. Clarke.


Monday, February 22, 2010


Sometimes I just want to fail out of school, abandon all of my material possessions, strip down in the street, and just jump as hard as I can, launching myself through the stratosphere and into the reaches of outer space, leaving only a pile of clothes and a heated path of displaced atmospheric particles in my wake.

Oh, what I would give to feel weightlessness. Sometimes this body of mine is just so unbearably heavy. Even if it meant suffocating in the vacuum of space, it would probably be worth it.

Have you ever thought about that? Suffocating in a vacuum? Just take a second to contemplate that. It wouldn't be like drowning. Or choking in smoke.

No fluid would flood your lungs. There would be no semblance of comfort in the routine and involuntary muscle contractions that you've come to take for granted over these long years.

You would just try to breathe, and nothing would happen.

Just think about that and try not to become overtly conscious of your own beautiful bodily mechanisms.

The beautiful miracle that is you.

If I could reach out and touch you right now, whoever you are, I swear I would reach out and hug you so tight.

I had another wonderfully good dream last night.

But I can not in good taste talk about it here on this public publishing.

So I guess I'll just have to leave you in suspense.

Golly, why did I even bring that up?!?!


Sunday, February 21, 2010

I watched the movie "Moon" two nights ago. I highly recommend it. It was very, very good. Also, it was directed by David Bowie's son. How can you say no to that?

Here's a picture of a really terrible Wii Remote accessory:


Saturday, February 20, 2010

I had a dream last night that I fell in love and grew old with a mute girl in Italy.

I have never in my life been so frustrated upon waking up.

And I've had some really bad mornings over these past few years.


Friday, February 19, 2010



Thursday, February 18, 2010

I've been meaning to post this for a long while now.


That's what I thought. I'll check another box.



So...apparently I've been playing DDR wrong all this time. Or at least with the wrong footwear. Heels are obviously the way to go when you're unnaturally flailing your legs around in place for thirty minutes.

I think I almost just broke my own nose.

I was putting on a turtleneck a minute ago, and was trying to figure out how to get the collar up and over my hair (as to avoid the inevitable static electricity). The chin was the first attempt, but that didn't work because the collar wouldn't stretch far enough. So, of course, the next natural step was to use my nose.

This turned out to be a mistake. About halfway up, I was faced with an alarming pressure in the back of my nose as the fabric exerted more and more stress upon my face. I was committed, however, to getting my shirt on successfully, and just hurried up from then on out.

Anyway, my advice to you is to not use your nose as a support for thick, tense fabric. Also, don't be a finicky, whiny baby and just put your shirt on over your hair.

Which I'm sure most of you already do, anyway.


Wednesday, February 17, 2010

[EDIT]: The first line should read, "When did wearing your stocking cap like this become..." 


Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Mmm...Chello Suite 1 in G Major...

Oh, what you do to me!

Monday, February 15, 2010

I'm just going to go ahead and say it.

I absolutely love Cascada's music.

Go ahead. Look at me that way all you want. I'm not afraid.


Sunday, February 14, 2010

200th post. Wahoo?

Ah, Valentine's Day...

It would be easy to be one of those people who just gets upset on Valentine's Day and refuses to be happy because it's "just a day to remind single people that they are single and it sickens me to see all the happy couples going crazy about it."

I have no problem with Valentine's Day. In fact, I wish all of the happy couples well. Why would I not want them to be happy? Am I jealous? Of course I am. But that doesn't mean I can't wish them the best. Valentine's Day, while it is over-marketed just like every other holiday, is great for people who are in relationships, and those of us who aren't should just be able to let it quietly come and go without making a big fuss about it.

Now, I'm not saying that it doesn't sting a little. It's definitely a day to be lonely, what with the media cramming it down your throat and all, but don't take it out on the couples. It's not their fault that we're not in relationships.

So be wistful on Valentine's Day. It's perfectly reasonable. But there's really no reason to get angry.

There are plenty of other magnificent reasons to be angry.


Saturday, February 13, 2010

It snowed in Columbia yesterday. It was incredible. I haven't seen a good snow like that in almost six years. Some friends of mine and I spent pretty much the whole night outside frolicking around like silly little children.

This is a pretty crappy picture, but it's really the only one that I took the time to take. Streetlights do not make for the best photographic lighting. 


Thursday, February 11, 2010

It's so quiet here in these hours of the night.

So desolate.

So lonely.

I raise my left wrist to my ear.

I listen to the gears of the mechanical movement clinking together, clicking into place over and over and over again, none of them ever realizing the amazing mechanism that they power. Never becoming aware of their own supreme significance to the overall whole. Never once coming to realize that in working together, they form a device that both ruins and breathes profound meaning and order into my life, simultaneously.

I carefully listen to the gears, turning, locking into place. I hear the sound of the spring wind a bit as the weight in the watch pivots down heavily towards the earth. I imagine the mechanism in slow motion, carefully picking out examples of mechanics in each minute nuance of the monstrous machine that is my wristwatch.

I focus on the ticking.





*Tick tick tick*


A car drives past on the road outside.

I panic.

I am ripped violently from my concentration. As I hear the unseen vehicle's front right tire hit a pot hole in the road, my mind is bombarded by slow motion interpretations of the car's suspension sinking under the weight of the impact. Visions emerge of the deformation of the tire upon hitting the jagged asphalt. The vehicle was heavy. It had to have been. The "thu-thunk" of the tire passing over the imperfection was too distinct, too profound to have come from a light vehicle. The rubber bends in my mind, animated force vectors and pressure fields superimposing themselves on the image, meaningless numbers emerging from everywhere. The tire snaps back to normal upon leaving the pothole, the suspension equalizes, and the driver settles back into place as the image speeds up and the car is gone, just as suddenly as it invaded my thoughts.

Quiet for a few moments. I wait in sickening suspense, hoping desperately for just a few seconds to be spared from thought. To focus on nothing.

God, what a feeling it must be.

*Thu-thunk, Thu-thunk*

No! Both tires this time!

Another onslaught of analytical images flashes uncontrollably behind my eyes. My body lies still in hopeless surrender to the nonsense in my head. I consider closing my eyes and praying for sleep.

But no matter.

The eyes have always been the weakest asset in the dark of night.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

I drew this one today in philosophy. I was inspired by the fact that it was freezing outside today, so obviously the most natural thing for me to do after lunch was to buy a neapolitan ice cream sandwich and eat it as I walked to class. People kept giving me these crazy-eyed, "IS HE OUTSIDE HIS MIND?!?!" looks all the way from the cafeteria to the science building. I don't know what the big deal is. Just because I have something cold in my mouth doesn't make the rest of my body any colder. And an ice cream sandwich in my stomach is not going to be a big enough deal to lower my core body temperature by any significant amount. If anything, ice cream is best when it's cold outside because it doesn't melt.

Come on, people.


Tuesday, February 9, 2010

So I actually drew this one today in fluids. It's been almost a year since I scratched out one of these doodles.

I must say, it felt pretty good, for some reason that I can't describe. I may start doing them once a day again.

Well, I finished Air Gear last night, and I have to say, it was very good. It was very dramatic and incredibly cheesy at times, but I still loved it. I used to think that I was a fan of more serious anime, where the characters maintain human proportions at all times and nothing silly or goofy ever happens, but Air Gear has proven me wrong. I didn't really realize this until today, but something about goofier, anything goes anime tends to make the characters resound stronger in my mind. Trigun, which I consider to be my favorite series so far, has some of the most resounding characters of all time, particularly Vash, and I think that it is partly because of the mildly loose manner in which the characters are regarded during the less serious sections of the show.

But about today's realization...

I had a moment of weakness last night upon finishing Air Gear and called upon the vast expanses of the internet and downloaded the soundtrack. I typically have strong feelings against piracy, but I have fallen into the realm of hypocrisy for this once. The music in that show is absolutely incredible, and I really don't have the hundred dollars that it would take to legitimately procure the entire two part cheated. I don't like saying that I've done it, but the imported soundtrack is just so expensive...

Anyway, I was listening to it earlier today, and it occurred to me as the music that I've become so familiar with over this 25 plus 1 episode series was coursing through my ears that I was subconsciously reminiscing on the characters of the show and wishing that I could exist in their universe. It was at this point that I realized how attached I had become to the characters in the show. None of them were particularly original, and many of them easily fell into classical archetypes, but somehow the silliness and overemphasis on extreme emotion had made them seem more human and memorable.

As I sat there, eating lunch before fluid dynamics, looking through the window beside me and taking in the overcast scenery outside of the engineering building, I heaved a sigh of boredom as I decided that I really liked Air Gear. Any universe (in any medium) that makes me hate returning to the actual world afterwards is usually good by default in my book.

So check it out. It's probably not for everybody, but it's engaging, doesn't take itself too seriously, and is just a great time overall.


Monday, February 8, 2010

I recently found a bunch of old doodles that I drew during my physics class from last year. I scanned them in and will be posting them over the next few days, in addition to the daily posts.

Well, as though on cue, I had a horrifying nightmare last night. After finally falling asleep at one, I woke up at four in the morning, terrified and unable to sleep easy for the rest of the night.


Anyway, I watched Gattaca last night, and I can not recommend that movie to you people enough. It's easily one of my favorite movies. It's so suspenseful and so interesting and so well put together and so...well, it's just so everything. Rent it. You won't be sorry.

Also, I've been meaning to say that I finished Something Wicked This Way Comes the other day. Overall, it was a great book, but I was kind of ready to be finished with it by the time I actually did. It was just long enough, bordering on a little bit too long. The ending kind of dragged on a little bit, at times imbuing in me a feeling of "just tell me what the hell is going on" rather than a feeling of suspense. But, I still recommend the book. It is still a wonderful story. Also, I'd like to recommend a book from my past. The Martian Chronicles, also by Ray Bradbury, is also a great book. So...check 'em both out.

I should be finishing Air Gear tonight. the last disk is coming in the mail today. I'll let you know what I thought tonight when I finish it.


Sunday, February 7, 2010

Bumper shenanigans, continued



Ugh. I wish that I would stop having good dreams. I wish that I could just go back to the nightmares to which I am accustomed. At least I know how to handle those.

I think I might add "waking up from a good dream" to my list of terrible sensations. The list of terrible sensations that I just made up on the spot that doesn't actually exist but seems appropriate for me to have at the time of this writing.

Anyway, I managed to drop my toothbrush in the toilet a few minutes ago. And it only seems natural that I had not yet utilized it for its primary function. I was spinning it around on my fingers and got a little too confident, so I guess I got what was coming to me. "Pick up a new toothbrush" is now sitting at the top of the itinerary for today. Right above lunch, followed by dynamics and fluid dynamics homework and reading an essay for philosophy and finishing the novel that currently has my mind captivated. And possibly some MGO. Who knows. We'll see.

Because I'm sure everybody was waiting in suspense to hear about my plans for the rest of my day.


Saturday, February 6, 2010

I thought that this was an...interesting combination of bumper stickers.

I keep having these terribly detailed flashbacks of the past year or so.

Of those times when I was happy.

Oh, it exponentiates the loneliness!

I don't know how much more of this I can take.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Well, I'm having trouble eating again. Food just makes me want to vomit.

And I can't sleep to save my life, either.

This bed is so empty.

These nights are so cold.

I came to a bit of a realization tonight. As I sat in the cafeteria, alone for dinner as usual, I came to the realization that I am not special.

I'm to the point now where I recognize probably every fourth person that I see on campus. I keep seeing the same people over and over and over again. All these random strangers. All these faces that I've grown to know and love. All these people whose lives I would love to share. Not out of nosiness, but out of curiosity. And maybe a distant hint of love and care. I look at them and theirs, reading the happiness in their faces, wondering what sort of stories and passions they have hidden away behind those eyes. And they look back. They look back long enough to register that there is a person sitting in that chair over there before resuming their business. And that's fine. That split second is enough for me. I revel in that brief but telling moment of human contact. That moment right before eye contact is broken. That nanosecond right before the mutual glance turns awkwardly to an unnerving stare. That indistinguishable but definite moment when neither party wants to look away. That moment when time hesitates, and barriers break down, both beings stripped bare and turned to the most beautiful, primal spirits.

And then time continues, unaffected and unbroken, as both heads turn away, ignoring completely the transaction that just occurred.

It was upon contemplation of this that I came to my realization. I sat there listening with only my ears to the conversations around me, taking them in. Three about who did what at the party last night. One about a guy and his bitch of a girlfriend. Another about a good book. I sat there and listened and realized: I am not special. I, much like everybody else in the crowd, am just a lonely face to be glanced upon, briefly brought into focus, and then swiftly forgotten.

When I drive, feeling every ounce of resistance in every push of the pedals and every unit of frictional force acting upon the tires as I turn the wheel, my car moves just like every other car.

When I do my homework assignments, lost in the wonder of mathematics, I follow the same rules as everybody else.

When I read a book, I read as everybody else reads.

When I unexpectedly run into an acquaintance, I put on the same happy face as everybody else.

When I wonder where my life is going, I wonder with everybody else.

I am not special.

I realized this as I sat there in the cafeteria, alone for dinner as usual.

Tasting, but not tasting.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

What did I draw today in philosophy class?

I can't figure it out.

Any thoughts?





Oh God...

*cough, wheeze*


Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Ploof. Ploof, indeed.


Monday, February 1, 2010

Well, last night was a big night for anime. I finished Big O and started Air Gear.

Big O was pretty incredible. I really love that show. It's close to the top of my list (Trigun really being the only one above it). I have to get the second season, though, because there was a lot of crap that they introduced in the very last episode and then just threw a "To be continued" screen at me. But it's such a good series. I highly recommend it.

Air Gear is also pretty good. It's a goofy, cheesy series that doesn't take itself seriously, which isn't really a bad thing. It's just fun, and it has a pretty cool premise. I've watched the first eight episodes since last night, and I'm liking it so far, so hopefully it can keep up the good work.

Anyway, that's about all the news I have on the anime front.

So, in the words of Roger Smith, "Big O! It's showtime!"


This Prolonged Addiction

Wait...crap. I was mistaken, Alkaline Trio's new album is coming out on the 23rd. I'm glad I checked, too, because I was about to go running around town  looking for it before my next class.

Well, now I have something to look forward to this month. It was, at one point, the release of Heavy Rain for the PS3, but I really don't think that buying a 60 dollar game would be a good idea right now given my current financial standings. So...I guess just like every other game that's been released lately, it's going to have to wait.